I’m a comedic actress and writer newly based in Los Angeles. HELLO SUNSHINE WHAT I LOVE YOU??? Winter is optional??? Do people know they can opt out of winter??? Prior to moving to the City of Angels, I lived in New York City for five years and remained entirely unable to figure out which way I was supposed to go when I exited the subway. If you ever saw someone walk up the stairs and then turn in circles for several minutes before blindly setting off in a direction, it was probably me. If you then saw them, five minutes later, hustling back to go the opposite way because their first instinct was woefully wrong, it was definitely me. For my first year in New York, I thought Hell’s Kitchen was the place they filmed the show, and spent years of my life being amazed by how many people seemed to live in that building. I’m a disappointment to my friends and family. Anyways. Win some lose some.

Here’s a list of some little things that I hate: old sofas, getting water up my nose, loud movies, being stuck in a situation where I can’t spit my gum out, sea urchins, and when I get in bed and my PJ pants roll up and my legs are bare and cold and when I reach down to pull one leg down, the other goes up, and when I reach down to pull that one down, the other goes up. Despicable. Here are some things that I love: the entire Bachelor franchise (though highly problematic in nearly every way, I cannot wean myself off), pink lemonade, Cookie Butter from Trader Joe's, Calvin and Hobbes, ridiculously high heels, and drum roll plz...MATCHMAKING!

Now I think we know each other a little better. This feels good.